[ignores smoke alarm] — Unisex Kitchen Apron

For the cooks who believe a little smoke just means dinner has personality.

[ignores smoke alarm] is made for chaotic kitchens, ambitious recipes, distracted home chefs, grandmas who cook by instinct, and anyone who has ever opened the oven and thought, “That’s probably fine.”

The minimalist caption keeps the joke clean and deadpan while the apron itself is built for real kitchen use. Made from durable 100% polyester, it’s lightweight, quick-drying, and easy to wear through weeknight dinners, holiday cooking, baking marathons, and the occasional culinary miscalculation.

Black detachable twill straps attach through four buttonholes for an adjustable fit, while overlocked seams help the apron hold up through repeat use and wash cycles.

Perfect for:

• home cooks
• moms and dads
• grandmas with opinions
• bakers
• holiday hosts
• funny kitchen gifts
• people whose smoke alarm is basically part of the recipe

Product Features

• 100% polyester for strength and quick-drying performance
• Black detachable twill straps
• Four buttonholes for adjustable attachment
• Overlocked seams for added durability
• One-sided minimalist text print
• Pre-constructed sizing with approximate variance of ±1"

Care

Machine wash cold, up to 30°C / 90°F. Do not bleach. Do not tumble dry. Iron or steam on low heat. Do not dry clean.

[BRACKETED]

your life, captioned.

EU representative: [Bracketed] by L. and S. Mangini, hello@wearbracketed.com, 534 Prizer Ct., East Brandywine, PA, 19335, US

Product information: Generic brand, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC

Warnings, Hazard: Blank product sourced from China

Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Do not bleach, Do not tumble dry, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean